What’s the worst part about being a cross-eyed teacher? They can’t control their pupils. December 31, 2024
I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthetic, they said: go ahead, knock yourself out. July 5, 2021
I saw an ad in a shop window, “Television for sale, $1, volume stuck on full”, I thought, “I can’t turn that down”. August 21, 2021