I just got fired from a florist, apparently I took too many leaves.

• Next story Egyptians claimed to invent the guitar, but they were such lyres.
• Previous story Why did Dracula lie in the wrong coffin? He made a grave mistake.

You may also like...

• Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

  June 29, 2024

• To the person who stole my anti-depressant pills: I hope you’re happy now.

  August 11, 2024

• Americans can’t switch from pounds to kilograms overnight. That would cause mass confusion.

  May 27, 2025